As someone who has a great passion for art, it feels wrong for me to create an ePortfolio on who I am as a writer without including my art work. Who I am as an artist has a great influence on how I approach language and communication and through sharing my high school portfolio with you, I hope you are able to make the same connections.
Mirrored
This piece depicts two women in a mirror. The faces were drawn in graphite and ink, the background and effects were done in watercolor, acrylic and ink. This woman is my first cousin Rose. I drew inspiration form her personality and women in general. Society forces women to behave in certain ways contradictory to their innate personalities in order to fulfill archaic norms that supplement the patriarchy. As we continue to breakdown these barriers, more and more women are coming into their own and not having to see themselves through this outdated mirrored lens.
A Mourning in Spring
In this direct observation, using acrylic to highlight the wilting of the flowers and the blooming shades around them, this piece signifies the contradiction of death in an era of blossoming life. It was on the cusp of spring that the pandemic hit and we went into lockdown. In the face of beautiful weather, long hours of sunlight, and blossoming nature, looming darkness sucked the life out of all that spring offered. We were unable to go outdoors. We were unable to experience the fresh air and aromas of the flowers. We were locked inside and from morning until nightfall, in a total state of mourning for the life we look forward to every year when spring arrives.
Peacefully at Rest
Using oil paint, I directly observed a vase, pinecones and a fur cloth. This piece is a homage to my grandfather and how essential he was in the life of his first cousin, Elizabeth, or Betty rather, who was more like his sister. The vase belonged to Aunt Elizabeth. She passed away on the day of my grandfather's wake. We believe she passed from pure heartbreak. The branches stemming from the vase symbolize the cracks in her life after my grandfather passed. The flowers and pinecones symbolize the continuing of life. We have moved on without them physically while they have been reunited somewhere else, peacefully at rest.
Shirin-Yoku
The Japanese phrase for forest bathing or nature therapy, this piece was inspired by personal internal conflict and how seeking beauty in the surrounding nature can heal the turmoil and desolation inside. In the piece, there is a woman, composed of a desolate forest, illustrated by graphite. She is somewhat translucent. Haunted by her internal strife, she finds herself slowly realizing the peaceful beauty around her. The transparent flowers and falling leaves present her with an opportunity to heal from the outside in since she is unable to heal from the inside out.
Moon Dance
This piece illustrates a big bright moon set against an ocean and a dark sky, with a tiny boat at the horizon line and two koi fish dancing around the moon. I used watercolor to convey the sensitivity of the elements coming together. The natural elements serve as escapism for me. I feel most peaceful at night and find the moon and the night sky as a source of calm and tranquility. I was named after my late grandmother, Cynthia, which derives from the moon goddess. Through this, I have a spiritual and familial connection to the moon.
Trapped
Using acrylic, I depicted myself behind bars, confronting different versions of myself. I painted this when lockdown began in March. I conveyed the three main stages of my adjustment: nostalgia, desolation, and hope. First, I was yearning to be free. I missed the outside world, rather the freedom to go out. I was nostalgic of the simple act of existing with the earth. From there I entered a desolate state. I wasn't inspired to do anything, except for my art. I knew what would get me through this was my art. Upon beginning this piece, I started to feel more relaxed and hopeful that at some point, we would see the light at the end of the tunnel. And now, it seems like we have.
Weeping
This piece is a direct observation of wilting flowers. The two prominent flowers and their petals were done in colored pencil. I used photoshop to make the petals transparent to convey the wilting stage of life and the finite time flowers have. I used graphite to emphasize the wilting stage of flowers. The gray tones and specific stresses through the strokes illustrate the end for these flowers. This direct observation captures the moment of wilting. The moment before death is final for these flowers. But it's important to capture all stages of life and give equal appreciation to them. Artists should equally pay tribute to nature in its early stages and in its prime as well as the final stages. After all, the final stages aren't death, they're simply the ones closest to it.
The Stage of Creation
Using dirt from my backyard, I sifted and strained the bigger chunks out and solidified the dirt with water, and let it sit until it got thick and malleable, waiting for the water to slowly evaporate until I was left with clay--a quarantine project of mine. I molded the natural clay into a woman being birthed into the head of a tulip. From a religious perspective, God molded the first humans, Adam and Eve, from natural elements. This piece honors the importance of nature in the creation of our modern world.
Stillness
This piece was a direct observation of fabric, branches with dying leaves, and a vase. It was done all in charcoal. There is something powerful about still life art. There's nothing else going on, no hidden meaning, the art is unabashedly itself. I found comfort in the bluntness of the objects and the mood they created by being placed together. In a way, it was peaceful.
A Peaceful Transfer of Souls
Against a backdrop of midnight blue and layered flowers and skulls, a flurry of vibrant poppies and deteriorating skulls take center stage in this piece. The graphite fails to win in the fight against the colorful ink of the poppies. The black ink flowers that once flourished are dying with the skulls. This piece represents new life rising in the face of old life dying out. I was inspired by the prospect and eventual reality of the circle of life. The midnight blue is the old guard fading away into the night. The small poppies signify rebirth and the continuation of life.
Powerless
This piece is a prime example in which art allows the artist to understand themself. Painted in acrylic during my sophomore year in high school, "Powerless" took on a life of its own. I suffer from panic disorder and generalized anxiety disorder. After a series of panic attacks, I compartmentalized my emotions and entered a brief depressive state. What kept me going was my art, this piece in particular. What started out as a childhood version of myself against a dark background, finalized as a girl appearing to drown in water when held horizontally. The process of painting this piece physically mirrored my subconscious processing my emotions out mentally. When I finished this piece, I suddenly felt healthier and whole again. I realized I wasn't as powerless as mental health problems often make us think we are.
Dreaming of Freedom
After lockdown began, I started to have a recurring dream of a sea turtle freely swimming in the open ocean with no pressure or responsibilities. It quickly became clear to me I was the turtle swimming in the ocean, longing for freedom. Depending on the environment, turtles can either be very slow or very fast. On the land they're slow. In the ocean, they're fast. During lockdown, all humans were stunted and were put on pause, unable to move. Even on land, a simple turtle, in a way, was faster than us. In the end, it's not the speed by which you consume your freedom, it's the manner in which you do.
Wonderland
This piece represents the passage of time. I started this piece before the pandemic and finished it after lockdown started. Therefore, the passage of time is significantly stressed and twisted, as lockdown has distorted our perception of time and reality. Doing this piece during my junior year of high school, my reality was stretched and consumed by SATs, ACTs, extra curricular activities, homework, and outside work. Then after lockdown, my relationship to the outside world full of my responsibilities diminished, and I was left having to balance the outside world with trying to expand the inside one, which was my bedroom. Like Alice in Wonderland, where everything is not what it seems and time becomes a foreign concept. In lockdown, time as well has become a foreign concept.
Becoming One
As our ever-evolving materialistic world consumes our time and our priorities, this piece serves as a reminder that we are all derivatives of some kind of nature. With this piece, I converge mother nature and human nature together, to exist as one. I believe in order to fully embrace our humanity, there must be some attempt to embrace nature as well. We've neglected nature and the environment to the extent our planet is dying at a more rapid rate. The combination of the human heads and the flowers symbolize the human race's responsibility to maintain nature and all it has to offer. The heads are the stems of the flowers. In this case, emphasizing our responsibility to support nature in it's struggle just as a stem would support a flower.
THINGS
With this direct observation piece, I wanted to pay tribute to The Addams Family. One of the iconic aspects of the show is THING, which is the hand that creeps out and can move about on its own. It is quite animated and displays a range of emotions. I used graphite to draw the hands and marker for the background. The fingernails are made up of hand-cut geometric paper conformed to the shape of the finger. I made this piece in my junior year, amidst great pressure academically, socially, professionally, and otherwise. It was non-stop. I was always moving. My hands never stopped. The series of hands coming at the viewer is overwhelming; this was to serve as a parallel to my mental state during that time.
Sacrifice of Youth
Aging is a slow and sometimes shocking process. Often times on a random morning we look in the mirror and do not recognize the face that stares back at us. And yet, there is a new youth evolving and coming of age all around us. Graphite allows the depth of aging in the face to contradict the youthful lines in the flowers. Using watercolor, the geometrical shapes take on a fresh look with the intention of making them out to be in the form of cells, symbolizing new life. Even still, the process is slow. What remains of the woman's youth can be seen in the left eye area, as to personify that beauty is in the eye of the beholder as well as the beauty with which one surrounds oneself. In the end, in order to dedicate time to breed new life and encourage healthy youth, whether that be in humans or nature, older beings must sacrifice their own youth. That is the circle of life.
The Women
This piece presents a duality of two women. The first woman, done in graphite with portions cut out of her face, is older and more withered, having experienced a longer life. The second woman, done in ink, giving off a more youthful look as she seems to be supporting the older woman. The nature elements surrounding the women, from flowers to amoeba cells to wilting leaves, mirror the wilting of the first and blooming of the second woman. There is an ambiance of maternity here, but because of the manner in which the women are drawn, one has to question exactly which one is the real mother.